Relationships
Building a Love That Lasts: 10 Keys to a Happy Marriage
6 min read
3 min read
A practical tool to help you get clarity about your thoughts and feelings, and take your relationship to the next level.
“What do you like about me?” Sarah asked her date. She was trying to get a gauge on how much he liked her and how well he really knew her.
But before replying, Jon turned the tables and said, “What do you like about me?”
She thought for half a minute, and rattled off a list of 20 reasons why she liked him. “Jon, I like you because you’re, kind, generous, thoughtful, caring, deep, personable, musical, connected, strong, sensitive, wise, patient….” At the end of the list Jon was speechless. How could she see all of that in him? She surprised herself as well, realizing how much she knew about him and how deeply she cared for him. It was from this place of vulnerability that Sarah and Jon were able to take their relationship to the next level and start to think about a future together. And yes, it was a happy ending, they got married.
All too often we don’t take the time to articulate what we are thinking and feeling. Have you ever felt a strong connection to someone but hadn’t put much thought into why you really connected with them? And likewise, have you dated a person you felt liked you but he or she never expressed why, and you’re wondering what it is exactly that they see in you.
Using a phrase that ends with “because” encourages you to go articulate and go into more detail why you like, connect with, or are interested in another person.
Not great at conveying how you feel? Practice helps! Here are 30 sentence starters. Take some quiet time and complete the sentences. They will help you get clarity about your thoughts and feelings. You can then take the next step and share your thoughts with your date. It will strengthen your bond…and might help move your relationship to the next level.
For now, don’t worry if what comes after “because” is deep or more superficial. Just practice using “because.” As you become more comfortable, you can work on digging deeper and providing reasons with greater meaning and depth.
Practice using “because” with family and friends, then move on to using it with people you're dating. The more you use it, the more comfortable you will become. I think you should try this because I know it works!
May you strengthen your relationships because great relationships make a great life.