What People Get Wrong About Body Positivity

Over the past few years, the body positivity movement has exploded. Models of all sizes are gracing the covers of fashion magazines and appearing in clothing ads. Women are embracing their natural body shapes and shunning extreme dieting. They are aiming to be content – not skinny.

However, despite so many positive societal changes, body positivity often gets a bad rap. Some people say it’s not healthy to be body positive and that it encourages negative habits. They believe that being thin should be the goal because that means you are in optimal health, and some don’t mind body shaming people if it means they get their point across.

Let’s dispel the myths around body positivity and encourage more people to embrace this meaningful movement.

Being Body Positive Means “Letting Yourself Go”

Before body positivity emerged, the thinking was that fat = unhealthy and thin = healthy. But the truth is that this is not always the case. Somebody can be overweight and have perfectly good blood pressure and cholesterol levels, and someone who is thin could have issues with these health indicators. Someone who is thin may be denying their body the nutrients it needs, while someone who is overweight has a well-balanced diet. BMI is not a perfect measurement of health, and health is much more holistic than the number on the scale.

Body positivity does not advocate for “letting yourself go.” It’s about accepting your body as it is, without trying to change it. For instance, you may go on a run just because you like to exercise, and not because you’re trying to make your body smaller. You eat a salad because it’s nutritious, and not because you want to be a size 0. It’s fine to want to lose weight, but it’s okay if it’s not your goal. Personally, I exercise because it’s fun, and I appreciate my body for the amazing things it can do. I eat fruits and veggies because I like the way my body feels when I do that – not because I feel like I need to lose weight, and I combine them with lots of other foods also.

Being Body Positivity Means You’re Happy All the Time

Look, even body positivity people have bad days and don’t feel great about how they look. Bad days are part of the process. Nobody feels good about themselves every second of every day. Even the most physically beautiful people in the world don’t always believe that about themselves. Everybody has a negative voice in the back of their head, and some days it’s just more prominent than others. Body positivity people accept it and then try to use positive affirmations and move on, hoping for a better tomorrow.

Body Positivity Means Being Immodest

Often, body positive women – especially models – will wear clothes that are revealing, and they will declare that they feel great about their curves. Even if other women dress like this, that doesn’t mean they have a monopoly on pursuing a better relationship with your body. You can cultivate a body positivity mindset no matter how you dress. As a woman who dresses modestly, I am still body positive. I find ways to look beautiful and feel wonderful and comfortable in my clothes and skin, proving that dressing modestly and body positivity can absolutely go hand in hand.

Becoming More Body Positive

If you want to become more body positive, there are some easy steps you can take. First, use those positive affirmations every single day. Tell yourself, “I am beautiful,” “I am worthy of love,” and “I am strong.”

Instead of focusing on trying to become thin, focus on trying to become healthy, with guidance from a doctor. Going in for a checkup and looking at your vitals is key, and so are your mental and emotional health. Consider talking to a therapist as well if you are in a negative place.

Take some time to learn about what Judaism teaches about taking care of your body as well. The Torah instructs us to “guard our health,” (see Deut. 4:9) which means our physical, mental, and emotional health. Maimonides teaches to avoid habits that hurt the body – when it comes to body image, that could be mean starving yourself and possibly binging afterwards because you’re trying to attain a “perfect” shape. When we are healthy, we are better able to serve God, who created us in His image.

Surround yourself with people who love you for who you are and stay away from those who make derogatory remarks about your body. If a loved one is saying negative things, tell them how it makes you feel. Perhaps they aren’t even aware they are doing it because they do it to themselves. If they don’t get the message, do not be around them during triggering situations – like mealtimes – and ask a therapist for help coping with their remarks. Distancing yourself could be the best plan of action.

It's important to look at what you like about yourself and emphasize those things. For instance, you may be a really hard worker or care about your friends and family. When it comes to your body, look at what parts you like about yourself. Start with those things, and hopefully, overtime, you’ll learn to love your entire body also.

Remember: Loving yourself is not always easy. It takes practice to feel good, especially if you’ve been so negative your entire life. Body positivity can transform your life for the better, and it’s well worth giving it a try.