When Life Is on Hold

You’ve been there. It’s that heavy silence in your house when you’re waiting for the answer that might change everything: medical results, a job interview, or the arrival of true love.

There are things you want so deeply that it hurts to even think about them. In that space of waiting, life hangs in limbo, on hold, and real living will only begin once you finally get the answer you’re hoping for.

Here are five possible things to focus on while you’re in this vulnerable, unscripted place.

Choosing Faith

It’s easier to have faith in God when things are going your way and life is flowing. Believing that there is an all-powerful God who loves you more than you can imagine and only wants what is truly best for you is harder when things aren’t going your way.

Waiting challenges your faith because it asks you to trade your demand for certainty for a willingness to trust. It strips away your illusion of control and asks you to believe when you would much rather have answers.

Remind yourself that God really does love you and can do anything. He only does what is good for you, even when that good is hidden from view or feels impossible to reconcile with your current pain.

Identity

Pain can shake you to the core, to the point where you no longer recognize yourself and start questioning who you even are. That’s when it matters most to hold on to your inner identity.

Are you only yourself when you hold the proud badge of a job title? A mother? An earner? A partner? Someone with a clean bill of health?

You are more than any role you play. You are a soul.

Your thoughts, speech, actions—and certainly your life circumstances—are garments of your soul. They clothe your soul, but they are not your soul itself. Don’t confuse the garments with who you are.

Your essence remains intact, no matter the outcome.

Real Joy

Living with discomfort teaches you how to cultivate real joy, the kind that allows you to put a smile on your face and genuinely feel it, even when life feels unresolved.

Waiting teaches you that joy is not a reward for answered prayers. It is a strength you can develop, even in uncertainty.

One tangible way to practice this is to schedule something small each day that brings you joy: a walk around the block, music in the kitchen, a call with someone who makes you laugh. See this as a declaration that your life is still happening now. Joy grows when we give it space, even before the outcome arrives.

If you can cultivate joy during the lows, imagine how powerful your joy will be when things actually fall into place.

Empathy

When life is smooth, it’s easy for you to become insulated from the struggles of others. When you’re in limbo, feeling that lack, you begin to notice it everywhere.

You see the friend going through a divorce, the neighbor struggling to make ends meet, or the woman who always seems to be in and out of the hospital. Waiting softens the edges of your ego and widens your heart.

Empathy is a fundamental Jewish value. To internalize another person’s pain, you often need to have felt the weight of your own.

Appreciation

Mastering limbo requires learning how to hold pain and pleasure at the same time.

Can you enjoy a cup of coffee even if you’re feeling lonely?

Can you notice the deep blue of the sky while you’re waiting to hear that someone arrived home safely?

Can you laugh with your child while anxiously waiting for that phone call?

You don’t have to wait for life to be perfect to let yourself live it. Embrace the good even during times of uncertainty.