The World Says You're a Jew. Now What?
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My birthday is October 7th, and I refuse to stop celebrating it. In fact, I believe we were all reborn that day.
I have a birthday twin in L.A. We were both born on the same day, in the same year.
Our birthday is October 7th.
After that infamous day in 2023, my friend told me she would never celebrate her birthday on October 7th again.
But I think she’s wrong.
When I tell people I was born on October 7th, their reaction is usually one of three things: silence, a gasp, or a sad, “Ohhh…”
And then I tell them: There are no accidents or coincidences.
October 7th was a wake-up call of seismic proportions for all of us.
I am not hiding from my birthday. I am not shunning it. I am embracing it as a powerful message from Above—because I believe all of life is filled with messages, if we are willing to see them.
October 7th was a wake-up call of seismic proportions for all of us.
It wasn't the first time a crisis forced open a door we'd rather have kept shut.
During the lockdowns of Covid, a spotlight was suddenly turned on inside our homes.
Some of what we saw was beautiful: families reconnecting, playing board games, baking bread, appreciating one another, protecting and cherishing the elderly.
But some of what we were forced to see was painful.
One woman called me and said, “I always knew my husband drank a little too much. But now that we’re locked down together, I realize my husband is an alcoholic. Is my marriage over?”
“No,” I reassured her. “Your marriage isn’t over. Let’s be grateful that you know. Now let’s get you some help.”
They are still married today.
Another woman reached out to me: “Lori, I thought I had a great relationship with my son. But now that he’s home with us through Covid… well, I think my son hates me. What do I do?”
I told her the first thing she needed to do was thank God that she knew.
Because knowing the truth—even when it hurts—is the beginning of being able to change it.
October 7th jolted us, in the most horrific way imaginable, into a reality many of us had been unwilling—or unable—to fully see.
The antisemitism was there all along. It was painful to discover that much of it had simply been waiting for an opportunity to reveal itself.
The antisemitism was there all along. It was painful to discover that much of it had simply been waiting for an opportunity to reveal itself.
But would we rather be blind and not know? Would we rather look away?
There are moments in a person’s life when you suddenly find out who your real friends are.
It can happen after a divorce, a financial loss, a prolonged illness, or another crisis.
A woman I know got divorced and discovered that most of her “friends” sided with her wealthy husband.
She was devastated.
I told her something that may sound harsh, but I believe is true:
More painful than discovering that these people weren’t her true friends would have been going through life believing that they were.
Reality hurts. But illusion can turn a life into a lie.
Yes, my birthday is October 7th. And after the initial reaction I described above, I tell everyone:
We were all reborn on October 7th.
If we are not different people and a different nation after that day—if our existing organizations don’t wipe their boards clean, rethink what they are doing, and reimagine what they can become—then what was it all for?
We cannot, and should not, simply “go back to the way it was.”
We know too much now. We have seen too much.
And with that knowledge comes responsibility.
The question is not only: What happened to us on October 7th?
The question is: What are we going to do with what happened to us?
How are you different since October 7th?
How are your relationships different?
Your family?
Your friendships?
Your community?
Your organization?
Your connection to Israel?
Your connection to God?
Your understanding of what it means to be a Jew?
I cannot answer these questions for you I can only answer them for me and make a few suggestions:
I’ve already moved to Israel and now I am louder than ever that this is the place to be. If you are not living here now, take a step towards it, have that conversation with friends and family. You may be surprised that they may be considering it too. In the meantime, visit! It’s the home of your soul and the ultimate family reunion.
For most of us, our Bar are Bat Mitzvahs were our graduations out of Jewish learning, instead of our graduations in. Decide now to take a second look at your heritage that changed the world for all time. We are “the people of the book”—let’s read it! The week of October 7th this year falls on the week we all begin reading the parsha from page one again…together. Be part of the greatest “bok club” ever.
Judaism is not a spectator sport. Like Nike, we must DO IT! It’s not all or nothing, so pick a mitzvah you have been thinking about doing and make it your own. Lighting shabbat candles, putting on tefillin, saying the Shema every day, giving tzedakah… Raise the bar 10% every year and soon you’ll be soaring high.
A wake-up call is only useful if we wake up…and really change.
So, yes. Happy Birthday to me and my friend.
And happy re-birth to us all.
