How to Tap into the Spiritual Energy of the Hebrew Month of Sivan

Shavuot, the holiday that commemorates the giving of the Torah on Mount Sinai, occurs in the Hebrew month of Sivan. That’s why the unique spiritual aspect of Sivan is the energy of receiving.

There’s a difference between receiving and taking. Just as the moon receives light to reflect it, receiving is essentially part of the process of giving.

If receiving is in order to give, then receiving the Torah also involves actively doing something with it. We are not intended to be a passive recipient, but to do our part to perfecting the world – starting with ourselves. Inculcating Torah principles is transformative.

But we must have the capacity to receive. If we are arrogant and selfish, we have no space inside to receive anything. On the other hand, if we have no sense of self, and feel broken and unworthy, we can’t hold onto what we’ve been given. How do we thread that needle?

You must take care of yourself before you can care for others.

One answer is the concept of self-care. Self-care is essential to your life's mission. When you are grounded in a good place, you are in a better position to offer help to others. It's like the safety instructions on a plane; you must put on your oxygen masks before helping others. The same principle applies to life; you must take care of yourself before you can care for others. When you care for yourself, you can intentionally choose to show up in the world how you want. Self-care is more than just a buzzword; it is a crucial part of well-being.

Self-care keeps us on the healthy side of acts of kindness. The Torah exhorts us to be kind and loving to others. That doesn’t mean to focus solely on the needs of others. That leads to burnout, feeling drained and unsupported. It's not sustainable. As the great sage Hillel said, "If I am not for myself, who will be for me?"

But Hillel also said, "If I am only for myself – what am I?" The danger of being selfish is a double whammy – it harms others and leads to feelings of isolation and loneliness. Between arrogance and self-abnegation, we are confused about the proper way to be because we think in polarities, with two states at opposite ends.

There is a middle path. A Jewish approach to the concept of self-care is described best by positive psychology guru Tal Ben Shahar, who coined the phrase "self-full," meaning you are full enough in yourself – you have the energy and resources you need to be there for yourself and for those around you. When you are self-full and perform acts of kindness towards others, you are making a positive impact in the world while boosting your well-being. Giving and receiving become two sides of the same coin; when you give, you also receive. It is a beautiful cycle of positive energy that can uplift both the giver and the receiver.

Giving can come in many forms, such as donating to charity, volunteering at a local organization, or simply being there for a friend or family member. Donating to charity is an excellent way to give back to the community. Donating can be done financially or by volunteering your time or skills. Countless organizations could use your support. Volunteering can be a rewarding experience that helps others and improves your well-being, for there is something special about giving your time and skills to others in need.

Being there for a friend or family member is a simple yet powerful act of kindness. It is about showing up when they need you the most, listening to them, and offering support. Being there for someone can make all the difference in their lives and help you feel more connected and fulfilled.

Asking for help can be difficult but it’s essential.

Receiving can be just as important as giving, and can come in many forms, such as graciously accepting a compliment, asking for help, or simply allowing someone to be there for us. It is about allowing others to offer help and support you when you need it.

Asking for help can be difficult but it’s essential. We all need help sometimes, whether due to personal struggles, health issues, or work-related stress. Admitting vulnerability is not a weakness; it’s a courageous act of self-care. It is about acknowledging that you are not alone and that it is okay to lean on others for support. Even the Lone Ranger had Tonto.

On Shavuot, God gave us the beautiful gift of the Ten Commandments. May we receive them in a self-full way. May we learn how to grow our potential while cultivating what is possible for others, and may we take care of ourselves and those around us. Let us embrace one of the messages of the month of Sivan, that both giving and receiving are powerful acts of kindness that can help us feel more connected and fulfilled and improve our well-being.