The Wit and Humor of Jewish Comedians

Among the branches of the extensive comedy tree, one stands out for its enduring impact and inimitable wit - Jewish comedy. In 1978, psychologist Samuel Janus conducted a study that found that although Jews constituted only 3 percent of the U.S. population, 80 percent of the nation’s professional comedians were Jewish.

According to a Pew poll in 2020, more American Jews considered “having a good sense of humor” more basic to their Jewish identity than following the Jewish law -- the ratio was 34%:15%. Their gentile counterparts also consider humor to be one of the primary characteristics of American Jews, according to another survey.

For decades, Jewish comedians have graced the stages, radio broadcasts, television screens, and the silver screen, with their unique brand of humor that combines clever wordplay, self-deprecation, and a keen understanding of human nature.

Here is a curated selection of the funniest Jewish comedians and some of their best jokes. From the borscht belt comedians of the early 20th century, like the legendary Milton Berle and Jackie Mason, to contemporary trailblazers like Sarah Silverman and Larry David, Jewish comedians have undeniably influenced the world of comedy. Their comedic sensibilities often reflect the Jewish experience, blending cultural references, relatable family anecdotes, and an astute ability to find humor in life's everyday quirks.

Groucho's retort when his daughter was restricted access into a country club pool (Jews were not allowed in most country clubs at the time): "But my daughter's only half-Jewish. Can she go in up to her waist?

"A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months."
-Henny Youngman

"What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet."

“I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.”
-Woody Allen

“Is one Nobel Prize
so much to ask from a child
after all I've done?”
-On parenting, from David Bader's Haikus for Jews

“What did the Jewish mother ask her daughter when the daughter told her she had had an affair?—‘Who catered it?’”
-Alan King

“I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.”
-Jack Benny

“Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.”
-Milton Berle

“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”
-George Burns

“At 60, I could do the same things I could do at 30, if I could only remember what those things are.”
-Billy Crystal

“A date is an experience you have with another person that makes you appreciate being alone.”
-Larry David

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
-Buddy Hackett

Did you hear the one about the elderly Jew on his deathbed who sent for a priest, after declaring to his astonished relatives that 'I want to convert.' Asked why he would become a Catholic after living all his life as a Jew, he answered: 'Better one of them should die than one of us.' -Alan King

“I used to walk into a party and scan the room for attractive women. Now I look for women to hold my baby so I can eat potato salad sitting down.”
-Paul Reiser

“The setup of the joke is that it’s a Jewish joke,” Seinfeld explains before actually telling it: “Two gentile businessmen meet on the street. One of them says, ‘How’s business?’ The other one says, ‘Great!'” (Mystified? Here’s the explanation: Clearly, only gentile business owners would say, “Oh, business is going great!” If they were Jewish there would be something to complain about.)
-Jerry Seinfeld

Even technology is showing signs of antisemitism, Sarah Silverman jokes. She asks Siri how many Jews there were in the world. The response? “Too many.”

“My Jewish wife was supposed to come with me today, but she couldn’t get off the bed … the jewelry was too heavy.”
-Don Rickles

A young Jewish boy, being an obedient son, goes to the bakery to deliver a message from his mother to a very busy and very overworked baker. As the baker is working, the boy yells out, “My momma says there was a fly in the raisin bread.” The baker continues at his task, hardly taking notice. So the boy yells out again, “My momma says there was a fly in the raisin bread.” The baker, wishing to put an end to the nuisance, says, “Fine. So bring me the fly, I’ll give you a raisin.”
- Myron Cohen

“I was the only Jewish kid in a Catholic neighborhood. They all did Hail Marys, I did Hail Murrays.”
-Joan Rivers

I’m Black and Jewish which means I’m proud, but I feel guilty for it.
-Rain Pryor

If you’re from a big city like New York you’re a Jew even if you’re Catholic.
If you’re from Butte Montana, you can have a dozen Bar Mitzvahs and you’re still a goy.
-Lenny Bruce

I'm not a very serious Jew. I don't wear the protective religious headgear. They only wear that because 40% of all religious thoughts escape through the head.
-Jon Stewart