Vampire Weekend's Surprising Jewish Stories
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Practical ways to make a memorable Passover Seder.
Passover is the most celebrated Jewish holiday. (In the US, approximately 70% say they plan to attend a Passover Seder. In Israel, a whopping 93% of Jews attend one.) Here are six tips for injecting meaning and fun into your Seder.
When I was growing up the most common question asked at our family’s Seder was: Is it time for dinner yet?
Make sure your kids get enough rest and eat enough so that they’re not exhausted and starving as the Seder begins. Some families sit down for a whole meal before the Seder. That way they could focus on talking about Passover instead of being hungry and grouchy.
Another tip to prevent kids - and adults - from being “hangry” is to offer substantial vegetables for nibbling near the beginning of the Seder when we say the blessing over karpas (vegetables) and dip them into salt water (representing the salty tears our ancestors shed in Egypt).
One year, our rabbi invited us to his family Seder on one condition: he asked each of us to prepare something to say, kids and adults included. That turned out to be one of the best Seders we’d ever been to. It was fascinating listening to the short insights each guest contributed, and we all felt included.
Passover Seders are designed to stimulate discussion and questions. Ask participants to bring an insight, tale, thought, or comment with them to share. With so much user-friendly Passover content available online, this doesn’t have to be onerous. Assigning “homework” helps everyone feel invested, and ensures that you’ll have thought-provoking conversations around your table.
The Passover Seder is a great time to honor your family’s past - and to make new traditions that your kids will always remember.
Before Passover starts, consider making phone calls to elderly relatives and asking for their favorite Passover recipes. Let your kids know that they’re enjoying Aunt Susie’s chicken soup or Bubbe’s Passover brownies. It will help them feel even more connected to their heritage.
When it comes to items on your Seder table, this is a great opportunity to honor old family heirlooms and also to make your own beloved new ones. Polish your grandfather’s kiddush cup or your grandma’s candlesticks, and use them at the Seder. Ask your kids to help make items for your Seder table too. Seeing a beautiful matzah cover or Seder plate they made can help kids feel powerfully connected.
I have an confession: my favorite Haggadah is The ArtScroll Children’s Haggadah (by Shmuel Blitz, illustrated by Tova Katz), a version with bright illustrations on each page and a simplified English translation aimed at young kids. I use it every year, and even bought a bunch for our guests. The clear layout makes it easy to follow and having lots of copies makes it easy for everyone to follow along and find the page number when they get confused.
Before your Seders, spend some time looking at different Haggadahs and choose one that’s right for your family. Buy enough for everyone at your Seder.
The Talmud notes that in every generation we each have an obligation to view ourselves as if personally leaving Egypt (Mishnah Pesachim 10:5). One way to help foster this feeling is to make your Seder as creative and participatory as possible.
One year my kids picked up a backpack and a staff and marched around the table, singing that they were leaving Egypt. My mother-in-law had her grandchildren put on a play of the Exodus from Egypt (complete with props and costumes). Purchase some toys representing the ten plagues. One year, a neighbor dressed up as the prophet Elijah appeared at my mother-in-law’s door when we open the door to greet Elijah.
Searching for the afikomen offers another chance to boost the fun level of your Seder. Make sure you stock plenty of gifts to give to the child who finds it - as well as all their friends. A little brainstorming about some creative touches can make your Seder memorable.
Back when I was a kid, I remember being utterly confused about some of the long passages in the Haggadah. The second half, particularly, after the dinner, seemed to lack a clear narrative structure. It was only as an adult that I realized that’s because I didn’t realize that a lot of the Haggadah is made up of traditional Jewish prayers.
The Haggadah begins with Kiddush, the blessing over wine or grape juice that’s made each holiday and Shabbat night (and lunch too). After the meal, the Haggadah contains the Birkat Hamazon, the traditional Jewish blessing after a meal, then Hallel, a beautiful compilation of psalms that’s sung on Jewish holidays, then several traditional Passover songs. Spend some time planning how you intend to pace your Seder. And don’t forget to leave time for the fun songs at the very end. (They’re the best part!)
One last piece of advice: Enjoy! May you have an uplifting and joyous Passover.
I absolutely adore the picture at the top of this article! I need it lol. Who created it and where can I get it on Seder plates, kiddish cups, etc.? 🤣